Thursday, September 11th action

Last night's six-handed action got off to an exciting start even before our poor disheveled host, Sir Lawrence, made it home. Starting the night where he left off last week, lost and confused, Sir Lawrence neglected to shut the alarm off in his home despite inviting his guests to walk in thus inviting the local police to pay this legal card game a visit. Fortunately for all players, neither cop chose to "tase" Drunk Action Dan back into coherence. Anyway, just minutes after this incident, Sir Lawrence's night took an even worse turn when he pushed all in with a flush draw only to miss and be cracked for his first $300 by Michael J. Hauer.

Much like Clark Kent, all Sir Lawrence needed was a costume change to get his superhero powers back. Sir Lawrence ran upstairs, changed out of his girly nurses scrubs, scrounged up $100 from the petty cash bowl he keeps by his bed and cashed back in. Several hours later, Sir Lawrence had turned that measly $100 into over $1400 for a nightly profit of $1160. Sir Lawrence was helped along the way by a $1,000 plus hand with Mr. Dana when Sir Lawrence rivered his full house with his pocket Kings to beat Mr. Dana's high flush. Much like other great superheroes, Sir Lawrence has a sidekick always by his side that helps him along the way and Sir Lawrence's help came in the form of Drunk Action Dan who continued to dump pots his way to return the game back to the form it has known for the past several months.

In fact, Drunk Action Dan did make up for lost time from his missed session last week by dumping $500 to the group after winning the first two hands of the night. Dan is now down nearly $6,500 for the year or a little more than 25% of the $25,000 of the commissions he made yesterday in closing $2,000,000 in mortgages. Right. Dan's debacle included an ill-advised bet on the state university of New Jersey and his 15th straight wrong sided bet on a Phillies game.

As for this blogger's favorite player, Michael J. Hauer, the momentum couldn't be maintained from last week as Msgr. Hauer lost $402. In fact, Msgr. Hauer appears to be the only one who can't figure out Drunk Action Dan as he lost a big hand because of a $50 gut shot call by Dan (which worked!) and losing a big coin flip to him as well. This recent turn of events threatens to drive Msgr. Hauer into the same mental state as the leader of his beloved Titans, Vince Young. Maybe they can share a therapist.

Kevin Todd Cooper had a rough evening breaking his four session winning streak by losing -$394. His big loss of the night was his flopped Jack high flush which lost to Drunk Dan's flopped top set which turned into quads on the river. Cooper, the god of bad karma, probably deserved the loss by not-so-coyly babbling on the phone while playing the hand. On the upside, Cooper only accidentally flipped his own cards face-up one time all night. Well done.

Mr. Dana had an up and down evening winning early, losing in the middle of the night and battling back towards the end of the night to close out the night +$44. Coincidentally, +44 is about the number of points his beloved Orangemen will need to successfully cover versus the Nittany Lions this weekend. Mr. Dana started off the night shaking, supposedly from Wawa coffee and not the thought of Matt Cassel starting for his Patriots all season, but entertained us all by giving Sir Lawrence the slow roll of the year and showing his full house to Sir Lawrence's high flush only after Sir Lawrence had allocated a large percentage of that big pot to his $14,000 a year in real estate taxes. The karma gods did eventually get Dana back later on in the aforementioned pot that initially busted Mr. Dana versus Larry (also flush versus boat). Overall, a solid night for Mr. Dana as in addition to the impressive battle back to positive ground, he also successfully and correctly counted out his chip stack at the end of the night.

Finally, last but certainly not least, Joseph Crawford arrived late as usual and took advantage of Drunk Action Dan as though he was just another lawn that needed to be mowed. Very businesslike, J. Crawford took home +$70 for the night, barely enough to cover the registration fee on the K Smith tournament in little over than a week.

Have a great weekend.